November 14, 2010
In the past week or so I have had some struggles but the Lord has been faithful like He always is. Today I was at church and I was able to sing a song called “Here with us.” It is about how Jesus was here with us on earth to save us. It is such a beautiful song. When I stepped up on stage I looked out in the crowd and I saw this face that completely shocked me. One of my orphanage kids was there with his mom.
But the thing is, is that this young boy is one that never gets to see his mommy and hardly ever leaves the orphanage. Sergio picked him up this morning without me knowing and let him come to church to see his family. His mom is a major alcoholic and her brain is basically gone from all the drugs before. She is doing a little better. Anyways, so Chuma is the little boy and he is 10 years old. He has a lot of issues but I adore him. I have never seen him so happy. He was like I have my mommy! Tenielle, I have my mommy! I could hardly sing in the beginning because tears filled my eyes as they walked up to be prayed for. This little boy and his mom danced together hand in hand in praises to our great God. Sergio and I began to cry as we watch them together. It was one of the happiest moments of my life, to see this little boy so incredible joyful. He hugged me so tight and kissed me on the cheek.
Right now I am able to stay at Sergio’s house for a little while, for a break and some renewing time. I have been in a lot of pain lately and Satan is definitely trying his best to bring me down. But, Sergio has helped me tremendously. He reassures me who I am in Jesus and how much he loves me. But I miss the kids a lot even just being gone for only a day now, and being able to see one of them. I miss all the hugs and love.
The other day I sat down with two of our 12 year old boys to help them with homework, Roberto and Jeovany. They are super silly and always trying to make me laugh. Well, Roberto decided that he needed to try on my glasses. So he took them off of me and he says, “wow you look different without glasses.” I was like what? Better or worse, and I smiled. Then Jeovany says, “With or without glasses you are beautiful.” I was in amazement as he told me that. Jeovany is one of my little ones that I am closet too. He calls me Mama and we talk a lot.
As I struggle and cry in front of God I keep thinking of how much I love the kids here and I know that this is the place I am suppose to be. I told God to guide me and show me what He wants for my life here and when He is ready for me to leave and serve somewhere else that I am ready to follow His will.
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